sleepless

it is midnight and i am wide awake. 36.5 weeks and insomnia has hit. or maybe it is just a sick joke preparing me for infant-hood. riley starts kicking at 10 and doesn't stop. for hours. quite an active little person he/she is. but, alas, i am thankful for those little kicks.

i am also thankful for tbs on nights like this. 3 episodes of sex and the city in a row make it all more manageable.

it is the off limits midnight snack, however, that make me nuts. you know, just a little pudding would be nice. but nope. no pudding. no cookie. no cake. no ice cream. no fun.

oh and on another note, if you are a mom, pregnant, sentimental, emotional, ect, ect, ect, do not read jane green's new book promises to keep. i really love her books but this one had me boo-hooing. every night. tonight i read for an hour and a half just to finish the dang thing. unless you are a glutton for punishment or just need a good cry, skip this one. it honestly might be the reason for my sleepless nights.

commercial is over. back to my guilty pleasure. nite nite.

preggers ramblings

in just a few weeks this little miss' life will change. she is really excited and will remain excited IF (and only if) riley is a girl. if not, well, she might just try to keep him from coming home and living in these four walls. she is cute. yes. but she is a little tricker, too. i'm gonna have to keep an eye on her.

this pregnancy has flown by. until now. i remember with addison, how the days just seemed to go on forever. how they creeped along. us just sitting here. waiting. anticipating. and being completely naive as to what this whole parenting thing is all about. then BAM, here we are, three years later. sitting. waiting. anticipating. and yes, still somehow remaining naive.

i am 34 weeks and measuring on time. when the dr told me this i reminded him that little miss also measured "on time" and still seemed to be a whopping 9 lbs 12 oz. his response? "yeah, i don't think we will be getting a small baby this time either." great. nice. can we induce NOW? if we do, i might get a shot at a 6 pounder. just a thought.

so, i am pretty confident induction is in our future. i was a week early to the day when addison was born and i just can't fathom the thought of watching the friday night sidelines show between pushes, wondering when terry is going to turn his phone off silent and get the heck off the field to come join us while we welcome our 16 pound baby into the world. or even better, trying to get a hold of him while he sits and watches "history in the making" as joe paterno and savior saban grace the field of the newly expanded bryant-denny stadium that holds 101, 000 completely insane, crimson wearing, bear bryant worshiping, "we got 13" yelling, good 'ole sweet alabama folks. yep, i pray for an induction. riley doesn't need to be exposed to the roll tide nation quite so early.

on another note, i didn't take many pictures my last pregnancy and i certainly haven't taken any this pregnancy. but today i actually ironed my clothes. i actually fixed my hair. i actually put makeup on. i mean, i actually looked normal. and no one was home to take my picture. so, i took matters into my own hands. for history sake, riley, here is "our" picture. i love you already!

the long ride

i am just shy of 31 weeks. bearing the summer heat as much as i can. you know, staying indoors, riding air conditioned trains, and hanging in the pool watching little miss "jump" off the steps.

thankfully i have gained under 20 lbs this time around but dang it, i still managed to get gestational diabetes. i had a small (ok, large) pity party today. i guess i just have felt so confident and proud for not going overboard with riley. but what can you do. goodbye ice cream, hello glucose monitor. oh yay.

so, what once was a fast moving pregnancy now feels like it is creeping by. like a train ride. at least i have this little cutie to look at along the way.

speaking of this little cutie, we have her orthopedic appointment tomorrow morning to check on her hip. i have no idea if i ever even blogged about her hip but as a baby she was born with hip dysplasia (yes, like the kind dogs have). she wore a brace contraption for a few months and thankfully it corrected the problem. now we just have to keep checking on it, every year, until she is 5 or 6. i just pray that her little bone is still growing the way it needs to be.

things with my cousin are still the same. no real change. just playing the waiting game. i know my uncle just wants to see his eyes open. i so pray that happens soon. just a little flutter, a few seconds to see, for matthew to say to them "i'm hanging on, you hang on too." they have a long ride ahead of them, i pray for them endurance and hope.

i had no intention for this to be a medical blog but i guess that is what it has become. to my friends out there, thanks for reading, thanks for praying. and please, don't eat a donut around me. i might bite your hand off.

(about the pic...a few weeks ago we were in the mountains with my mom and jim and we took a fun little ride along the toccoa river in an old train. she loved it - can you tell?)

what to do?

the tingles are frugal these days but the idea of preschool daily tugs on my mind. to send her or not to send her?

i have been putting it off and today i finally made the call to our church preschool. and just this morning a spot came open for the Tuesday/Thursday 3 year old class. i was secretly hoping in the back of my mind that they were all full so the decision would be made for me. but that just ain't how things work, does it? ha.

so i have until tomorrow morning to make the decision. and i have no idea what to do. i know it should be a no brainer but i go back and forth so much on what to do. i guess after sending her to daycare for two years it would make it easier but it actually makes it harder. i just got her back - do i want to send her away again? i know, i know....2 days for 4 hours is not exactly sending her away again. oh the drama my mind creates :).

so, all you moms out there with cute little preschoolers...help! is two days even worth the money? educationally? socially? ect? ect?

heavy heart

we made it back home after being in georgia for over a week and it feels nice. but my heart and mind are still there. still with family.

my cousin was in a car accident last night that has resulted in some major injuries. from far away my dad keeps us updated. sends his love back for us. and waits with my aunt and uncle. waits with them as they worry. waits with them as they weep. just waiting. the next 72 hours will be critical. as of now he has conquered death for 24 hours. i pray that it quickly turns into 72 hours. 7 days. 5 weeks. a year. a lifetime. in the meantime, we wait. and we pray.

i love to laugh

addison is obsessed with mary poppins. if you remember it at all you know there is a song called "i love to laugh" where uncle albert's case of the giggles sends him floating and flying in the air. love that song.

i am known to laugh in my head during movies or just when i hear something silly. i just chuckle silently to myself. but i do laugh out load. especially when i am around my family.

it has been an amazing day just relaxing here and there and laughing with my sister and the rest of our crazy crew. i would tell you some of our tales but you probably wouldn't even find the humor. but we do.

grand tetons. ha. twins in my bum. haha. burp. hahaha. ha.

happy 4th eve. happy laughing.

i am not a morning person but i do love morning time with little miss.

every night we have to hang a dress and a pair of panties on addison's dresser. changing into these special outfits is her first and most important task of every day.

but once the dress is on and breakfast is attempted, my favorite time begins - snuggle time. she just hops up on the couch and leans on me while we watch the last remaining minutes of seasame street or mary poppins (for the 100th time). these are the moments i have missed for the last 2 years. but dang, i am so blessed that i get them with her now.